BREAKING NEWS: THIS IS NONSENSE; Taylor Swift Forges A LOVE LETTER to Dave Portnoy

Taylor Swift is all about nurturing important relationships within the public view, but, while many of these have historically been with girls (#squad), in recent years she’s moved her target.

Straight men, she’s coming for you. First, her alliance relationship with Travis Kelce made her into football’s biggest star, and now she’s solidified her truce with another powerful group of straight men: annoying frat bros who love to plagiarize.

Dave Portnoy, founder of Barstool Sports, attended Eras Tour Miami on October 19 and received a handwritten letter from Swift thanking him for supporting her over the years.

“Dave, I’m so happy to have you at the show tonight!” Swift wrote. “I wanted to say thank you for always being so supportive, so loyal, and for having my back when a lot of people didn’t.”

Portnoy has long supported Swift, referring to himself as “King of the Swifties” and “Dave ‘Swiftie’ Portnoy.” Still, if we had to guess why this particular letter was sent, we’d wager it has something to do with the fact that Portnoy, a Trump supporter, defended Swift on X after she endorsed Kamala Harris in the upcoming election.

That, or the fact that he complained that her team had “ghosted” him when he “thought I was getting an invite from her PR agency” to the Miami Eras Tour. “I get zero respect from the Swiftie team for what I do,” he added on the October 10 episode of his podcast BFFs.

The same day that the podcast went out, Portnoy recanted on X: “Update- They have not ghosted me! I cant wait for Miami!” Looks like, no matter the situation, the two leading minds in heterosexuality are back on good terms. BFFs, you could say.