Dean Martin Called It ‘Garbage’ Live — His Son Heard It and Started to CRY

Dino heard his father’s voice through the headphones. I have absolutely no idea why anyone would call that music. The studio audience laughed and Dino’s hands shook so hard he nearly dropped the guitar neck because 30 seconds from now he’d walk onto that stage and play the exact music his father had just mocked in front of 20 million people.

Wait, because what Dean said on camera that night and what he said after the camera stopped would define a relationship between father and son that would last 30 years. And almost nobody saw how big the risk was between those two moments. Dino was 16 years old, standing in the wings of Studio 4 at NBC Burbank, absolutely terrified.

 This should have been the best night of his life. His band Dino Daisy and Billy had a hit record. They were performing on national television. On his father’s show, The Dean Martin Show, pulled 20 million viewers every Thursday night at 1000 p.m. 20 million. Every teenager in America would see this. Every kid at school, every girl who’d bought their record.

 This was everything a 16-year-old rock musician could want. Except Dino’s father hated rock music. Genuinely despised it. And for the past three months, Dean Martin had been making that hatred very clear on television. Dino’s bandmates stood next to him. Desi Arnaz Jr. son of Luchiel Ball and Desi Arnaz, 16 years old, holding his bass.

 Billy Hinsha, same age, gripping his guitar. All three were shaking. They could hear Dean’s opening monologue through the stage monitors. Dean was doing his usual routine, walking on stage with a drink, making jokes, introducing the show, easy smile, perfect timing. But tonight, the jokes were about rock music, about long hair, about loud guitars, about noise passing for music.

 The studio audience laughed at every line. Dino felt sick. You think he’s really going to support us? Billy whispered. His voice cracked. Dino didn’t answer because he didn’t know. He’d asked his father that question a week ago. Dad, are you going to make fun of us on the show? Dean had looked at him with those unreadable eyes and said, “I’m going to do what’s best for the show, son.” That wasn’t an answer.

 That was Dean Martin speak for I’ll decide when I get there. And now Dino was about to find out what his father had decided in front of 20 million people on live television with no way to stop it. Notice something about this moment. Dino wasn’t scared of failure. He wasn’t scared of performing. Dino Daisy and Billy were good. Really good.

 They’d been playing together for 2 years. Tight harmonies, solid musicianship. Their single I’m a Fool had charted. They’d performed dozens of times at school dances and small venues. Dino could handle the performance. What terrified him was the possibility that his father would humiliate him publicly. That Dean would introduce the band with a joke that cut too deep.

 That Dean would make it clear to America that he thought his son’s music was garbage. That kind of rejection doesn’t just hurt, it defines you. And Dino knew it. The stage manager appeared. Headset on, clipboard in hand. Two minutes, boys. You’re up. Right after the commercial break, Dino’s stomach turned over. Through the monitors, he heard his father’s voice getting louder, more animated.

 Dean was building to something. The introduction, Dino gripped the guitar neck so hard his knuckles went white. Desai put a hand on his shoulder. Whatever happens, we stick together. Dino nodded but couldn’t speak. Before we go on, you need to understand what the Dean Martin show was in September 1965. It wasn’t just another variety show.

 It was Appointment Television. The show had premiered that same month and became an instant hit. Dean’s format was deceptively simple. No rehearsal, no script, just Dean being Dean, walking on stage with a drink, singing a few songs, introducing celebrity guests, doing comedy sketches. He made it look effortless, like he just wandered onto the set and decided to put on a show.

But underneath that casual surface was complete creative control. If Dean didn’t want something on his show, it didn’t happen. Period. NBC gave him that power because Dean Martin was gold. Ratings gold money gold. 20 million viewers every week. Gold. And Dean had used that power consistently to mock rock and roll.

 When the Beatles exploded on Ed Sullivan earlier that year, breaking every viewership record, Dean had done an entire bit about it. I watched that Beatles thing, he’d said, sipping his drink. Couldn’t tell if they were boys or girls. Couldn’t tell if they were singing or yelling, but teenage girls were screaming, so I guess it’s music.

 The audience had roared with laughter. Dean had smiled that perfect smile, but underneath the joke was real disdain. Dean Martin believed in craftsmanship, in learning to sing properly, in orchestras and arrangements and real musicianship. Rock and roll to Dean was kids with guitars making noise. No talent required, no skill, just volume and screaming.

 When the Rolling Stones released their early records, Dean had played a clip on the show and said, “I think my television’s broken. That can’t be music. That’s just noise with hair. More laughter, more applause.” Dean represented the old guard, the Sinatra generation, the kuners, the professionals. And rock and roll was the enemy.

 The barbarians at the gate. The end of real music. Every comedian on television was making similar jokes. But when Dean Martin said it, it carried weight because Dean wasn’t some outofouch comic. Dean was cool. Dean was Vegas. Dean was the standard. If Dean said rock music was garbage, millions of people believed him. Now picture Dino’s position.

 He loved his father. idolized him. But Dino also loved the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Beach Boys. That was his music, his generation’s music. And 6 months ago, Dino had done something that changed everything. He’d started a band. His best friend, Desi Arnaz Jr. had the same problem.

 Son of famous parents, parents who represented the old music, parents who didn’t understand. So Dino and Desi recruited Billy Hincha and they formed Dino Desi and Billy. They started playing Beatles covers, Rolling Stones songs, Beach Boys harmonies, rehearsing in Dino’s garage, playing at school dances, getting good, really good.

 When Dino told his father about the band, Dean’s reaction was exactly what you’d expect. A rock band, son. Why? You’ve got a good voice. You could learn to sing properly. Why waste it on that garbage? Dino had tried to explain. Dad, this is what kids my age listen to. This is our music. Dean had shaken his head.

It’s not music, it’s noise. But Dean had also said something else, something important. You want to waste your time with this rock band? Fine. Learn the hard way. Dean’s philosophy about parenting was simple. let your kids make their own mistakes. So Dean didn’t forbid it. He just let Dino do it, assuming the kid would grow out of it.

Except Dino didn’t grow out of it. The band got better. They started getting noticed. A record producer saw them perform at a school dance in June and offered them a deal. By July, they’d recorded I’m a Fool. By August, it was on the radio. By September, teenage girls were buying the record. Dino Desi and Billy were becoming famous.

 Not Beatles level famous, but famous enough. Famous enough that NBC executives noticed. Famous enough that they pitched an idea to Dean. Put Dino Desi and Billy on the Dean Martin show. Father son angle. Great publicity. Great ratings. A family moment. Dean had said no. flat out refused.

 “I’m not putting a rock band on my show.” The executives pushed. “Dean, it’s your son’s band.” Dean didn’t budge. “I don’t care. It’s still rock music and I’m not promoting that garbage.” But NBC kept pushing for weeks. And eventually Dean agreed, not because he wanted to, but because he realized that saying no would mean rejecting his son publicly.

 And Dean, despite hating the music, loved Dino. So Dean said, “Yes.” But he made it clear to everyone, “I’m doing this for my son, not for rock and roll.” The question nobody could answer was what that actually meant. Would Dean support Deno or would Dean make his feelings about rock music very clear while technically keeping his promise? Remember this detail because it matters.

 The show was taped, not live. taped in front of a studio audience, then broadcast the following week, which meant Dean could say anything he wanted in the introduction, and if it went too far, NBC could edit it out before broadcast. But Dean Martin didn’t believe in safety nets. Dean believed in committing. So when Dean walked onto that stage in Studio 4 to introduce his son’s band, there were no second takes planned.

Whatever Dean said would stay. Through the headphones, Dino heard the commercial break ending. Heard the director counting down. Five, four, three. Dino’s heart was pounding so hard he could feel it in his throat. He looked at Desi, looked at Billy, both of them pale, both of them waiting. Then Dean’s voice came through crystal clear.

Ladies and gentlemen, our musical guests tonight are a young rock and roll band that’s very popular with teenage girls. Pause. Perfect timing. They’ve got a hit record and I have absolutely no idea why. The audience laughed. Big laugh. Genuine laugh. And in the wings, Dino felt everything inside him drop.

 That wasn’t support. That was mockery. That was Dean Martin telling 20 million people that his son’s music was incomprehensible garbage. Dino’s eyes started to sting. He blinked hard. Daisy grabbed his arm. Don’t listen. Just don’t listen. But Dino couldn’t stop listening because his father was still talking.

 “Now I’m told this music is called rock and roll.” Dean continued, his voice smooth and easy. I’ve been listening to their record, trying to understand it, and I think my record player might be broken because it just sounds like noise to me. More laughter, bigger laugh. The audience loved it. Dean Martin doing what Dean Martin did best.

 Being funny, being charming, being honest, and Dino standing there in the wings, feeling his entire world collapse because his father was destroying him on national television, and there was nothing he could do about it. Billy was shaking his head. I can’t do this. I can’t go out there. The stage manager hissed. Quiet. Dino couldn’t speak. Couldn’t move.

 He just stood there holding his guitar, listening to his father tell America that rock music was broken noise. Every fear Dino had about this moment was coming true. Worse than coming true. Because Dean wasn’t just mocking rock music in general. Dean was mocking their record. The record Dino and Desi and Billy had worked on for months. The record they were proud of.

The record that had actually charted. Dean had listened to it and thought it was broken noise and now everyone knew. But then Dean’s voice changed, got softer, lost the comedy edge. But you know what Dean said? Long pause. The audience went quiet. These three young men work very hard. They practice. They write songs. They perform.

 And even though I don’t understand their music, even though it sounds like organized chaos to me, I respect that they’re doing something they love. In the wings, Dino’s breath caught. Wait, what? Dean continued. One of these young men is my son, Dino. Another pause. Dean’s voice got even softer, more personal.

 And I got to be honest, when he first told me he wanted to start a rock band, I said, “Son, are you sure? because I’ve heard that music and I’m not convinced it is music.” The audience laughed, but it was different now. Warmer, sympathetic. Dean let the laugh settle, then kept going. But he was sure he loves it.

 And you know what I learned? Stop for a second and picture the room from above. Because what you’re about to hear only makes sense when you understand how rare this moment was. Dean Martin didn’t do sincerity on camera. Dean did charm. Dean did smooth. Dean did effortless cool. Dean didn’t open up. Dean didn’t get emotional. That wasn’t the brand.

That wasn’t the show. But right now, standing on that stage with 20 million people watching. Dean was about to do something he never did. He was about to be real. Just because I don’t understand something, Dean said slowly. Doesn’t mean it’s wrong. It just means I’m old. The audience laughed, but this time it was gentle laughter, affectionate.

 And Dean smiled that smile, the real one that actually reached his eyes. So, tonight I’m going to do something I never thought I’d do. I’m going to introduce a rock band on my show. And I’m going to smile and I’m going to clap and I’m probably not going to understand a single word they’re singing, but I’m proud of them.

 Especially the one in the middle. Dino’s vision blurred. Tears were running down his face and he couldn’t stop them. Desi was crying, too. Even Billy, tough guy Billy, who never showed emotion, had wet eyes because Dean Martin, the man who’d spent 3 months mocking rock and roll on national television, the man who’d called their record Broken Noise 30 seconds ago, had just told America that he was proud of his son.

 Not in spite of the music, because of it, because Dino had found something he loved and was working hard at it. So, please welcome, Dean said, his voice back to full showman mode. Dino Desi and Billy. The audience applauded, enthusiastic applause, real applause. And when the stage manager said, “Go, go, go,” Dino walked onto that stage on shaking legs with tears still wet on his face.

 The stage lights were blinding. The audience was a blur of faces. But there in the center stood his father, Dean Martin. Tuxedo perfect, smile perfect. And when Dino walked up, Dean put his arm around Dino’s shoulders, pulled him close for just a second, and whispered in his ear so quietly the microphones couldn’t catch it. You got this, kid.

 Make me proud. Then Dean stepped back, gestured to the band, and walked off stage. The orchestra started the intro. Dino Daisy and Billy played their hit song, I’m a Fool, and they were perfect. Tight harmonies, solid rhythm, professional performance. The studio audience loved it. Girls in the front row screamed.

 It was everything a 1960s rock performance should be. And standing in the wings watching his son perform was Dean Martin. His face showed exactly what he was thinking. Still don’t understand this music. Still sounds like noise, but my son is damn good at it. When the song ended, the applause was huge. Genuine.

Dean walked back onto the stage, put his arm around Dino again, and made a joke. Well, my ears are still ringing, but I think you boys did great. The audience laughed. Dean shook hands with Desi. Shook hands with Billy. Made a comment about their hair being too long. Classic Dean Martin comedy.

 Light, easy, perfect. The director called cut. The cameras stopped rolling. The studio audience started filing out and Dean pulled Dino aside. Away from the cameras, away from the crew, away from everyone. Hold this moment in your mind because when we come back to it, you won’t see it the same way. Dean and Dino stood in a corner of the studio near the equipment cases out of earshot.

 Dean still had his tuxedo on. Dino still had his guitar. Dean put both hands on Dino’s shoulders, looked him directly in the eyes, and said something that Dino would remember for the rest of his life. Your music is terrible, son. Dino’s face must have shown shock because Dean squeezed his shoulders harder.

 I mean that it’s noise. I don’t understand it. I don’t like it and I probably never will. Dino started to speak but Dean wasn’t finished. But you Dean’s voice got rough emotional in a way Dean’s voice never got. You’re wonderful and I’m so damn proud of you. Not because of the music. I don’t care about the music. I’m proud of you because you found something you love and you’re working hard at it and you’re good at it.

 That’s all that matters. Dean pulled Dino into a hug, tight and real. I don’t have to like rock and roll to be proud of you for doing what makes you happy. Dino was crying again, but this time it was different. I love you, Dad. Dean’s voice was muffled against Dino’s shoulder. I love you too, kid.

 even if your music gives me a headache. They both laughed. A real laugh. A father and son laughed. And in that moment, in that quiet corner of Studio 4, after the cameras had stopped and the audience had left, Dean Martin taught his son the most important lesson about love. You don’t have to understand someone to support them.

 You don’t have to like what they like. You don’t have to agree with their choices, but you do have to show up. You do have to be there. You do have to be proud. Listen to what happened next because this is where the story gets bigger than one TV show. The episode aired a week later, late September 1965. The ratings were massive.

 Over 22 million viewers, one of the highest rated episodes of the entire season. And the mail that came in to NBC wasn’t about the performance. It was about Dean’s introduction. Parents wrote letters. Hundreds of letters. Thank you for showing us how to support our kids even when we don’t agree with them. Teenagers wrote letters.

 My dad hates my music, too. But watching Dean support Dino gave me hope. The cultural moment that episode captured wasn’t about rock and roll versus traditional music. It was about the generation gap. About parents learning to let their kids be themselves. about love being bigger than taste. Dean never responded to the letters publicly, but privately he told his writers, “Maybe we should do more of that, less jokes, more heart.

” And the Dean Martin show did change after that episode. Got warmer, got more personal. Dean started talking about his kids more, started showing vulnerability. Not a lot. Dean was still Dean, but enough that people noticed. enough that the show became more than just entertainment. It became something people connected with emotionally.

 Dino Desi and Billy continued as a band for five more years. Had several more hits. Toured extensively, were genuinely successful. Not Beatles successful, but successful enough to build careers, make money, create something real. Dino eventually moved on from music in 1970, became an Air National Guard pilot, later became an actor, had a successful career doing what his father did.

 But in his own way, and through all of it, through every career change, every success, every failure, Dean was there. Still didn’t understand rock music, still made jokes about it, but always always showed up. In 1987, Dino was killed when his F4 Phantom jet crashed during a military training flight. He was 35 years old.

 Dean got the news on a Sunday morning. The official told him what had happened, and Dean, the man who’d made millions of people laugh for 40 years, broke completely broke. Friends said Dean was never the same after losing Dino. That loss contributed to Dean’s decline. He stopped performing, stopped leaving the house much, died eight years later in 1995, still grieving his son.

 But in those 22 years between that TV episode in 1965 and Dino’s death in 1987, Dean and Dino had something special. A relationship built on mutual respect, on understanding that love doesn’t require agreement. Dean never learned to like rock and roll, but he learned something more important. Being a good father means supporting your kid’s dreams.

 Even when those dreams sound like noise to you, especially when they sound like noise to you, because the noise doesn’t matter. What matters is that they found something they love, something they’re willing to work for, something that makes them happy. Years later in the 1980s, a reporter asked Dean about that 1965 episode about introducing Dino’s rock band.

 Even though Dean hated rock music, Dean’s answer was classic Dean Martin. Short, direct, true. I hated the music. Still do, but I loved my son. Still do. And between loving your kid and hating their music, loving your kid wins every time. Even if their music gives you a headache, that’s the lesson. Not about rock and roll, not about generation gaps.

 Not about television or fame or any of that. The lesson is about parenthood. You don’t have to understand your kids. You don’t have to like what they like. You don’t have to agree with their choices, but you do have to support them. Show up for them. Be proud of them. Dean Martin did that on national television in front of 20 million people and then again privately when the camera stopped.

 Your music is terrible, but you’re wonderful. Five words, the perfect summary of unconditional parental love. If you enjoyed spending this time here, I’d be grateful if you’d consider subscribing. A simple like also helps more than you’d think. And if you want to hear what really happened the night Dean had to choose between his son and his Vegas contract, tell me in the comments.

 

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