BREAKING: Angel Reese Refuses to Celebrate Pride Month — Says “WOKE Doesn’t Deserve to Be Commemorated,” Citing “Ideological Pit Stops”
New Orleans, LA — June 2, 2025 — LSU and WNBA star Angel Reese has reportedly put the brakes on celebrating Pride Month, stating that the growing influence of “woke culture” in sports has gone “off track.”
“This ain’t about hate,” Reese allegedly told a group of close friends at a private basketball event. “It’s about honesty. WOKE doesn’t deserve a trophy just for showing up. If you’re going to compete for equality, don’t make everyone drive the same car.”
The cultural engine roared to life as social media exploded with hashtags like #AngelStaysTrue, #PridePitStop, and #LeftTurnOnWoke.
Supporters called her a patriot. Critics called her a bigot. Some just asked: “Who is Angel Reese and why is she trending during Pride Month?”
TikTokers started parodying the moment, with one viral clip showing a rainbow-colored basketball spinning out while a voiceover says: “This ball refuses to bounce — just like Angel.”
LSU and WNBA Respond: Slow and Strategic
The official LSU women’s basketball X account posted a rainbow-themed logo earlier that morning, but when asked about Reese’s alleged statement, a league spokesperson said:
“We continue to celebrate inclusion, community, and the unique voices of all our players. LSU and WNBA have room for everyone — even if they’re driving in different ideological lanes.”
Translation: Please don’t cancel us. Or her. Or our sponsors. Please.
“Ideological Pit Stops” — The Phrase That Launched a Thousand Takes
Reese’s rumored use of the phrase “ideological pit stops” has inspired think pieces, memes, and one country song in the works titled: “I Shifted Gears When Woke Got Weird.”
Columnists on both sides of the political spectrum chimed in. Right-wing pundits hailed her as “a defender of freedom.” Progressive writers claimed it was “yet another example of casual intolerance disguised as individualism.”
Some LGBTQ+ basketball fans expressed disappointment, saying that the sport had only recently begun feeling more inclusive — and this felt like a backslide.
Sponsors Stay Quiet… For Now
Reese is sponsored by major brands like Nike, Beats Electronics, and Wingstop. None have issued official statements, but insiders suggest “tense group calls” and “urgent brand strategy meetings” are currently in progress.
An anonymous exec reportedly said: “We just wanted to sell sneakers and chicken wings, man. Not get dragged into the culture war.”
Public Reaction: Divided as Always
Online polls show:
44% support Reese’s decision to opt out of Pride Month celebrations.
49% oppose her stance, calling it “tone-deaf.”
7% thought “Pride Month” was a new sponsor for the WNBA.
A Change.org petition titled “Demand an Apology from Angel Reese” has already reached 85,000 signatures. A rival petition titled “Let Angel Be Angel” has nearly 120,000 — and a t-shirt line to go with it.
Angel Reportedly “Unbothered”
According to those close to her, Reese is aware of the controversy but remains “unbothered.” One friend said: “She just wants to play basketball. She’s not trying to start a revolution — she just doesn’t want to wear a rainbow logo on her jersey.”
